Former Students Share the Wildest Stories They Have From Grad School

Author image for Ally Perry
Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Mar 16, 2023 12:00 PM EDT

Take it from somebody who did it — sometimes the most deranged thing you can do after racking up debt in college is to choose to do it all over again. There are many reasons why a person might go to grad school. Some just don't want to stop being students, and others are genuinely passionate in the pursuit of knowledge. Others still think it would be a good way to make themselves even more employable (joke's on you, idiot). 

Academia attracts a colorful selection of the rich tapestry of humanity, emphasis on the rich. This is reflected in the crazy stories that it can produce. Recently, @BiologyCarly started a thread allowing the longsuffering grad students of the world to share their wildest tales from their time in further education. You'd think it would all be worth it when you receive another degree, but that is debatable reading some of these.

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  • 01
    Font - Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @BiologyCarly What is your most unhinged story from grad school? Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to a public bathroom with it in my hands and sobbed over its body in a stall.
    via BiologyCarly
  • 02
    Font - Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @BiologyCarly Or was it the time that I puked until my nose bled on my first boat outing with my PhD adviser? Hard to say...
    via BiologyCarly
  • 03
    Product - John P. Friel, Ph.D. @friel. 27 Feb Replying to @BiologyCarly I heard a buzzing sound coming from the room next to my grad school office. When I investigated the source, I found someone had put a carcass into our dermestid beetle colony without freezing it to kill the fly eggs and now there were thousands of adult flies trying to escape. GIF BECAUSE THE FLIES DON'T LIE.
    via friel
  • 04
    Facial expression - Rob O'Malley @Rob_O_Malley Replying to @BiologyCarly Kicked down a hill by a chimpanzee named Frodo. I am 6'3, 260lbs and I was AIRBORNE
    via Rob_O_Malley
  • 05
    Gesture - Dr. Alyson Abel (she/her) @adabel_sdsu Replying to @BiologyCarly Called my advisor "mom" on accident.
    via adabel_sdsu
  • 06
    Font - F.C Patrick McCray @LeapingRobot Replying to @BiologyCarly I was contacted by a person who claimed to have a sample of Beethoven's hair. He wanted me to help analyze it in his belief that this might help explain the "unusual rhythms" in the composer's music who might have had "Moorish blood." Hard no.
    via LeapingRobot
  • 07
    Font - Krista Koeller @KristaLerista Replying to @BiologyCarly My lab was given two tiger limbs for a dissection and when the skin was off, someone wore it over their hand like a mitten (so big!) and my advisor yelled at them because it was disrespectful. I thought that ship had sailed when the cat was dismembered. (Tiger died of old age)
    via KristaLerista
  • 08
    Terrestrial plant - safia aidid @safiyaaaay Harvard... where do I even begin? I would say teaching the son of a very famous (late) dictator who has since been charged with embezzling millions in public funds along with his siblings Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? ● Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via safiyaaaay
  • 09
    Font - Jonathan Fine @jonathanbfine I once taught a neo-Nazi who needed to learn German to use during a battle reenactment Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... • 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via jonathanbfine
  • 10
    Font - Nathan rd @rochellehd i found a half eaten sheet cake on top of a trash can by the library and took it to the grad student offices where we all shared it and had a great afternoon with trash cake. Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo.... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via rochellehd
  • 11
    Font - Craig Rodriguez-Seijas, PhD @CraigAnthonyRS The time I brought a bottle of cafe patron for our Year One Externalizing Intervention final exam and we all sipped it from mugs while writing the exam. .. +++++ It's been long enough I can admit this publicly and not get in trouble right? Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... · 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via CraigAnthonyRS
  • 12
    Font - Pevitr S. Bansal @PevBansal There was a dead rodent (#RIP) in the room I was going to defend my diss in One of committee members was like "no its fine we can stay here" but they clearly were not fine with it. We switched rooms and I dedicated my defense to that rodent A Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? ● Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via PevBansal
  • 13
    Font - josh grubbs (@JoshuaGrubbs... @JoshuaGrubbsPhD We interviewed an undergrad for our first year clinical interviewing class. The Professor hand picked this student because he was non-traditional, older, and a veteran. We all loved interviewing him, thought he was so cool. Two weeks later he murdered his wife. Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... 27 Feb ● What is your most unhinged story from grad school? Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ..
    via JoshuaGrubbsPhD
  • 14
    Font - Dr. Niki Khan @bula_niki An honours student had freeze-dried cat poop to analyse for metabolites and turned on the air con in the lab. Cat poop dust everywhere. She buggered off without cleaning any of it up. Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? ● Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via bula_niki
  • 15
    Font - 13 ft (((hellenized))) @ft_variations Oh wow. So many. Best one might be the time I wrote a letter to the dean explaining in detail why our stipends weren't enough to live on and in response the university asked me to undergo psychiatric evaluation. Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo.... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via ft_variations
  • 16
    Forehead - Glenn Sullivan @drglenn... 02 Mar Guy came in for a neuropsych eval, worried about dementia. Boasted about his IQ and science background. Gave us a list of chemicals he was exposed to in his work. Said he spent a lot of time in Mexico, "fishing." The chemicals were all meth precursors.
    via drglennsullivan
  • 17
    Font - Dr Sarah Taber @SarahTaber_bww the official designated bathroom at the field site was a patch of woods you had to jump a ditch to get there and since it was Florida, you had to look both ways for gators before jumping the ditch Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? ● Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Show this thread
    via SarahTaber_bww
  • 18
    Font - Mx. D. E. Anderson @diannaeanderson Professor: "Who's the audience for this Cisneros book?" Classmate: "Mexican-American immigrants." Prof: "yeah but do they read?" We were in TEXAS. Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to …... Show this thread
    via diannaeanderson
  • 19
    Font - Erin Westgate @ErinWestgate I had a fish tank in my grad school office. I'm in Texas for break, & my advisor is going in and feeding them everyday. I get a frantic phone call from him shortly before midnight (on New Year's Eve) that my fish were "exploding." Dear reader: babies. They were having babies Carly Anne York, Ph.D. @Biolo... 27 Feb What is your most unhinged story from grad school? ● Mine was probably the time I picked a dead flounder up off the lab floor and then ran to ... Sho
    via ErinWestgate

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